I’ve skipped a few days of journalling through this challenge. I’ll see what I can do to jot down some notes here to make it easier when it comes time for me to work on the album..
Day 2 – Long day! Very tired from Monday night’s workout. Felt stress, not sure why. Wanted to eat – from stress and fatigue. Felt good to just stick to plan and go home. I did miss the gym, but I really had no energy for it. Long days and nights with no sleep will do that to a girl.
Day 3 – VERY STRESSFUL DAY!! Came home to healthy food after dentist appointment. Had nap with plans for spinning later. Was awoken by a phone call of yet another layoff in our house. #6 in 12 years. Torn between wanting to eat, and no appetite at all. Scared to death.
Day 4 – Dealing with reality. Bought really flattering pants at Lululemon. Had awesome training session. It was even harder than Monday’s. It feels good to be challenged, and realize I am doing things I couldn’t have done in February. ie. walking lunges are now done with 10 pound weights when I started off with 5. I’m starting to see definition, but would really like to see fat loss. Sticking with this challenge will help me get to my fat loss goals. 4 days now of eating proper, working out, journalling it all, logging all food and workouts, taking vitamins nightly. Real challenge will be Friday night at Ginny’s.
Yesterday I bid farewell to my first Jetta. I can remember wanting a Jetta for quite some time, and in 2005 I finally leased my first one. I guess I always equated it with some semblance of status, so in that regard I had reached the status I had been wanting. I’m not sure where it comes from to be honest, maybe it’s because my boss in the only office job I held drove one. So, August 27 2005 I drove my first Jetta off the lot in Georgetown – and direct to an anime convention.
Yesterday I drove my second Jetta, off that same lot, and left my first behind. This time I drove it home, and then later to work. Less exciting, but definitely more accurate to it’s normal use.
I had contemplated getting a Rabbit or a Beetle, but I loved my Jetta too much to abandon it for a different model. The only reason it was being returned is it was getting up in lease mileage, and was about to need some big repairs I didn’t want to fund – brakes, tires. The road to getting this Jetta was full of bumps, but the point is, it’s all mine now!
I’ve spent a fair amount of time worrying lately about never really knowing where my passions lie. I feel like lately I’m so apathetic towards so many things that I have no idea what lights my fires within. Work is work – it’s a job. The politics have taken so much away from what enjoyment can be found in the job. I look at others enviously who do what they love, and love what they do. Some of my attitude is a byproduct of the environment I work in, where there is no incentive to excel, or go the extra mile. It’s human nature to want to be rewarded for the extra, and there comes a point where personal reward and satisfaction can only go so far. My other issue is I have reached a level of comfort at work – I have decent senority with decent scheduling options, I have a decent amount of vacation, I have a good pension plan that will look after me when I can finally retire, and I make a wage I am content with. Who wouldn’t want more really? But I am content and can live a comfortable life.
Last night, Steve and I spent a lot of time talking about my predicament. And the more we spoke, the more I realized my passions are right underneath my nose, and what’s more, they’ve been present since I was in my teens in high school, I just didn’t realize and articulate it. I did a co-op placement in physio hoping to deal in athletic injuries and rehab, only to deal in stroke rehab – which bored me to tears, and was highly depressing to me as well. Fitness and nutrition have become a cornerstone of my life. Nutrition counseling and athletic rehab perhaps in my future? I realize now I should have pursued a degree in Kinesiology. Now I’m in the process of locating a university that will allow me to pursue this degree on a part time basis. I have decided I will get my CanFitPro certification in both personal training and nutrition specialist. From there, who knows. In my fantasy land – it would be as an athletic trainer for an NFL franchise. Athletics, rehab, wellness, NFL and travel. Could life be any more perfect?!